Showing posts with label unemployed. Show all posts
Showing posts with label unemployed. Show all posts

Monday, April 30, 2012

Why I Love My Job

They say the human body has over 50 billion white blood cells, 
and I need every single one because this job makes me sick. 
this is the kind of job I would laugh about but for some reason i still do, 
its opposite to anything I would really want all the qualities of my dream job it lacks, 
its attempts at knowing I exist are simply pathetic. 
the last time i tried to be original, do something new got me laughed me off, 

How can I  think outside the box when I work in a cube?
being semi-comfortable in full mode Swahili presentation gets me labeled as a show off, 
if a train station is a where train stops, a bus station where a bus stops,
does it not follow logically that make my workstation should be where my work stops?
and in essence it does; so I pretend where to work so they pretend to pay me.

They don't want well informed, well educated people capable of critical thinking,
they are not interested in that, that doesn't really help them,
you know what they want? they want obedient workers, workers who
are just smart enough to run the machines and do the paperwork,
and just dumb enough to passively accept all the increasingly shitty jobs with lower pay,
longer hours, reduced benefits, and vanishing pension that disappears a minute you go collect it.

I keep thinking about what I want to do in life, my life,
to be more than this ball of frustration and anger towards a job,
I keep telling myself its due to the fact that this is not what I want to do,
yet I used to be passionate about this, used to feel good about it,
now all I think about is quitting, running off to open my own shoes boutique,
yet I know I cannot afford that luxury,

Yet my drive has been beaten out of my efforts, I have settled,
My motivation has gone from roaring flame to a smoldering heat,
I have become a former shell of who I used to want to be.
I know this job sucks but for some reason as opposites I keep attracting it,
What really matters in the end is that this job has truly helped me,
in finding out just where I want my next endeavor to be.

Yet this job currently sucks and I have it, but it has awaken in me
the need to do something better, a desire to move from the misery,
to never stop searching until I find something to please me,
there are over a trillion nerves in the central nervous system,
and this job gets on every single, believe me its does
and for that same weird reason is why I love this job.
Because it made me realise that I don't want to wait to see where life will take me,
I am gonna take life where I want to be.

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

You Have Been Let Go

With the economy in recession, a lot of people have been laid off. They say when its one person its a tragedy, when its many its a statistic, what do you to the man who sits in front of you and calmly says to you, "You have been let go, the company no longer needs you in service".

Just like that. In thirteen words, my world came crashing down all over me. A million questions were exploding in my mind confusing me, images forming and disappearing just as quickly, as I sat there, dumbfounded, trying to make sense of this new development and what it would mean for me and my family. I sat there dumbfounded and my thoughts seemed to be so disoriented that they couldn't penetrate through to my lips. As I thought about the twenty years that I gave to this company, my service, my time, my life- hell even my dreams. Everything depended on this job, how am I going to afford  a home now, sending my kids to school, putting food on the table, being a man of the household. Reality can play nasty tricks to a man's mind. 

The representative continued, "You will get three months pay, medical benefits until the end of the year, then you are on your own. We are very sorry. "

Unemployed. I know three trades, I speak three languages, and I have been here for 20 years. What more do they want than that kind of loyalty? Yet how can I still want to stay so badly? Its rough out there, no guarantees. I just wanted to break down and cry, are grown man allowed to do that? Before I could answer my own thought, a tear started to trickle down my eyes making its way to my lips, leaving a salt trail behind. 

The voice across me continued, "Your resume says that you minored in creative writing. Most students work at the fast food place. You busted your brains working with an editor at a publishing company. Then you got out of college and started working here. How much did they pay you to give up on your dreams?"

"Five thousand a year." I replied. 

"At what point were you going to stop and go back on what made you happy?"
Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...