Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Take Me As I am

Another day has dawned, another twenty four hours of condemnation,
another trial for failure, another denunciation by my society,
another attempt at redemption, another toss away roaming the streets,
another misfit wandering alone, another black sheep in the family,
another rejection by my father, another guilty verdict before i try,
another dejection, gloom, misery worn by my mother,
another soulless cry, another empty body starting to quiver,
another day to find a reason for existing, for living, for breathing.

All I get is abuse, the existence of a hunted man,
unappreciated and misunderstood is the order of the day for me,
I am not a bad person, I am as human as you are,
subjected to less than human treatment by others in my creed,
I used to have friends, used to have a real family,
used to have a mother's embrace and a father's stern nod,
I used to belong in this society, upfront and centre, I used to have kids,
I got caught up in the fast lane, now I steal just enough so I can get my next fix.

I tried to change this, tried to be different, tried to be better,
I have been bailed out of jail, just long enough until the police lock me back in,
I have tried to kick the habit just long enough until the dealer always tracks me down,
I have gone to rehab, but I crave the drugs as sunflowers face the sun,
I have tried to be a better person, a better woman, yet my children abandon me,
So I take what I need, nothing more nothing less so I can have reasons to exist,
I am weary and tired of responsibilities, being sober sucks more than addiction,
No matter what I do, I will never be good enough, so why try to be someone else,
I don't see how I can be any differently than what I am.  

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