Me, Myself and I...Part I

All my life, I have been scared, of being me, 

I have been worried that people don't like what they see

when they look straight through what i pretend to be

Controlled deep down and bounded to never be free 

I starved myself because I wanted to be perfect,

I wore no makeup to hide my insecurity,

I used to keep to myself because I was scared,

I talked to guys more because girls hated me, 

As I watched my own life pass me by,

Like a passenger, watched the scenery blur away,

created everyday by a committee in my head,

 through the choices I made, based on nothing that I wanted. 

My life came with instruction manual

Name me a time, a day, a second, 

I know what I am supposed to be doing, 

I went through the motions, feeling trapped. 

I mentally killed myself a hundred times, 

I wanted out, out of this body, this framed destiny, 

every moment was pre-ordained, without my approval, 

my consent was in the people driving me. 

I couldn't see them, touch them or feel them, 

but I could hear them loudly every time I took a turn,

every time I tried to find out what I wanted, 

who am I and whose life was I living?

Life broke me down, and I had to find a source

 of strength to pull myself up because

 I do not want to regret growing older, 

its a blessing denied from many.

Whose life am I living? everything in life is temporary,
if its good - it will change, if it is bad, it will change. 

Nobody said life would be easy, they promised it would be worth it
This road I am on will hopefully get me to where I want to be.